Now This Fifth

It got so warm here on Friday, I actually went for it:

I put on a shortsleeved shirt.😂

We were also preparing. We have a couple of friends, and their dog, from near Bristol staying with us for the long weekend. They appeared later on Friday.

Yesterday, the four of us and their hound did the sort of thing you do on a British bank holiday. We went to the RSPB bird reserve nearby and had a walk:

We also took them into, uh, bustling downtown Biggleswade:

[Market Square, Biggleswade, England. Photo by me, May, 25, 2019.]

It’s the largest town immediately around:

[High Street, Biggleswade, England. Photo by me, May, 25, 2019.]

My wife saw me take that photo. “For the blog?” she questioned.

“Of course,” I smiled.

Indeed, when you are writing, you never stop thinking – not even when friends are visiting. I admit that I can’t just “turn off my mind” currently for days at a time. Privately I’m a mess inside.

Reading parts of the manuscript surreptitiously by simply opening it anywhere and diving in on my iPad if we have had “down time,” several times I was definitely NOT happy. There is still lots to do. Repeatedly I found myself thinking: “That’s not nearly as good as it could be”; or “Geez, you are an adult: a 13 year old could have written that”; or “Oh, that’s an historical mistake, how did you write that?”

[My novels thus far. Photos by me.]

I have as you may know written four novels. And I’m proud of them all. Three are set in “modern” times while the most recent fourth is a “period” piece.

[The fifth novel, Tomorrow The Grace, in progress. Photo by me.]

Now this fifth is weeks away from being finished. Like the fourth, it is nearly 550 pages of various people and goings on over a decade (moving on to between 1795-1805) than I can’t possibly sum up in this blog post. I spend more time “there” inside my head than anyone around me fully realizes.

For instance, the actual RSPB headquarters building is, I’m sure, almost certainly a former stately home. I’ve not researched it, but I may now. Look at this:

[RSPB Headquarters, outside Sandy, England. Photo by me, 2019.]

What did I see? I thought of my current book: “That’s a larger version of ‘Langley Hall.'”

And always the fear is present that it is not good enough and will not be. I understand now why some authors do go loopy or worse – and especially when embarking on a several years’ long writing effort. I’m sure in the end this latest one will be… “perfectly fine” as “Carolina” is apt to say and that I’m worrying over nothing.

Yep, I keep telling myself that. 🙂