Six Words Never To Ask A Novelist

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….but they are employed regularly anyway. And as the Daily (w)rite wonders, how often is the question answered this way?:

Screen capture of Daily (w)rite.
Screen capture of Daily (w)rite.

Once you get beyond the “blank page,” the problem then turns into that question not being easily answerable.

Because you know that if you do actually try to address it properly, you’re sure your response will merely cause the questioner’s eyes to glaze over. You may have only an outline finished. Or you may have a series of disjointed pages, scribbles (figuratively speaking, if you use a PC and type), and additional notes. Perhaps you have a variety of chapters. You may even have a mostly completed rough draft, yet it’s so riddled with errors it infuriates you. (More than once, I have wanted to throw my computer out a window.)

When someone asks that you do also wonder if it is mostly just a polite inquiry. It is usually – at least initially – heard much along the lines of when someone asks, “So, how are you doing?” Chances are they aren’t looking to hear your full medical history.

Okay, all that said, I’ll risk it. “How is the novel coming along?” This morning, I feel I can reply this way.

Screen capture of Amazon.co.uk.
Screen capture of Amazon.co.uk.

Distances (the new book) is due out – you may know already – on November 29. It’s finished, but I’m still “cleaning up” bits here and there. Knowing me, I’ll probably be agonizing over this word or that up until the very last second.

Does that “answer” the question? ๐Ÿ˜‰

And, by the way, how are you doing, too?

Have a good Monday, wherever you are in the world. ๐Ÿ™‚

______
UPDATE: Just remembered this: You certainly don’t want to hear your filthy rich, wildly successful novelist father-in-law asking you that.

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